The Burn

Growing up my favorite time of year was always the holidays. I loved everything about them. The decorations, the food, the anticipation, the music, the smells. The atmosphere around the holidays is tangibly different. There is eager expectancy that everyone around you is a part of and you cannot help but get pulled into the excitement! I remember vividly being at my grandparents house on Christmas Eve and was unable to sleep almost the entire night because of the anticipation I had for the following morning. It wasn't just opening presents that I was excited about, it was the experience of Christmas. Celebrating a feast to it's fullest. Now I still love the holidays and I will happily listen to Christmas music year round (yes, I'm one of those people) but it is no longer my favorite season. In 2009 I experienced my very first Orthodox lent and Pascha and it was one of the most life altering experiences I have ever had. I had discovered my new favorite season.
Prior to 2009 my experiences with lent were limited and usually involved deciding that I should give up candy, tv, coffee or any number of other things that I knew probably weren't the greatest thing for me but only a few days in I would have totally forgotten my resolution and gone back to my normal routine. There was very little connection in my mind or life with how lent and Easter (Pascha) were related. Fast forward to 2009. Robert and I were inquirers at St. John the Baptist Greek Orthodox church. We were just starting to get familiar with a lot of the services, traditions, prayers and hymns of the church when we experienced our first Orthodox lent.
When I entered the church for the Great Compline service on the first day of lent the whole atmosphere was different. All of the chairs except the first two rows were cleared out to open up the sanctuary. The lights were dimmed so it was just bright enough to read in the service books. Everyone was standing silently and somber waiting for the service to being. As the chanting and prayers began I was able to follow along pretty well because I was very familiar with Small Compline service. The thing that surprised me in the service were the prostrations. As the choir began to chant the beautiful hymn "Let my prayer arise as incense before you and the lifting up of my hands as an evening sacrifice, oh Lord." everyone began to bow down on their hands and knees touching their foreheads to the ground and then stand back up again...and again... and again. Only a couple of minutes in I was convinced that this was the longest hymn ever as my legs were burning from the unfamiliar exercise. As the end of the service I felt spiritually uplifted in my exhaustion. The physical side of worship is something often forgotten about in modern Christianity but it is so essential. The act of prostrating yourself before someone challenges you because it is a physical act of humility. I came away from the service with a glimmer of the power of lent.
The first week of lent is called "Clean Week" as it is a time of intense fasting and extra services in order to have a strong beginning to our lenten season. A strict fast in Orthodox terms means that we are refraining from all meat, dairy, olive oil, and alcohol. While restricting our diet is a challenging part of the fast it is not the entirety of it.
The purpose of lent is to prepare us to enter into the celebration of Pascha. It is similar to training for a big race. We restrict our diets, we spend more time spiritually exercising ourselves and our daily routine changes to reflect that end goal. Our lives revolve around preparing for this singularly huge event. We do everything we can to make our minds, souls and bodies fit to fully participate in the test and then the celebration! Just as my legs burn while doing prostration after prostration in the same way the passions (sinful desires) are being burned away within me. Through out all of lent we fast and attend services frequently. There is a strong sense of community as everyone is struggling together and seeing each other much more often. We encourage each other as we work to draw closer to God and submit ourselves to Him.
Lent is often described in Orthodoxy as a time of "bright sadness" and nothing embodies that quite as well as holy week. Holy week is the last week of lent, beginning Palm Sunday through Saturday. Like Clean Week there are services every night but these services are very special. Sunday, Monday and Tuesday evenings we celebrate the Bridegrooms service which are some of the most beautiful services of the year and through the hymns prepare us for the betrayal and crucifixion of Christ. Wednesday evening we celebrate the service of Holy Unction which is service of healing. It is one of the seven sacraments and is done as another preparation for journeying though the rest of holy week into Pascha. Thursday evening is the 12 gospels service. There are 12 different readings from all 4 gospels that begin in the garden of Gethsemane and go through Christ's crucifixion but stop before he is taken down.

 During the reading of Christ's crucifixion the priest comes out of the alter carrying a large cross on his back and processes around the sanctuary coming back to the front and places the cross in front of the iconostasis and then puts a large icon of Christ onto the cross. After the service is completed a vigil is held in which at least one person is in the church praying through the Psalms out loud all night until the next morning when the Royal Hours service begins. This service is filled with Psalms and Old Testament prophesies talking about what is taking place with Christ on the cross. That afternoon we gather again at 3pm to take Christ off of the cross, wrap him in a white sheet and lie him in a tomb that is covered in flowers. While this service is short it is also one of the most powerful.

That evening we gather for our third service of the day and my absolute favorite besides the Paschal service. The Lamentations service is the funeral service for Christ but half way through there is a distinct change in tone from somber is anticipatory because even in our grief we cannot help but look forward to the resurrection. Saturday morning we celebrate liturgy and Christ breaking the gates of Hades open. The priest processes through the sanctuary throwing fresh bay leaves into the air and covering the floor of the sanctuary with them.
By the end of this service the anticipation for Pascha is so intense and I cannot wait for midnight to come. Finally after almost 50 days of intense fasting, dozens of services, hundreds of prostrations and spending the last week walking with Christ through the events from Palm Sunday to breaking the gates of Hades, we get to celebrate Pascha! The service is celebrated and midnight and so joy filled that is palatable throughout the room.

My priest has give the explanation that we always celebrate at midnight because, just like Christ we do not spend any extra time with him in the grave but triumphantly pronounce his resurrection the moment the third day arrives! And just as well fasted for 40+ days we celebrate for 40 days! At every service, before every meal, during our prayer times we joyfully sing the Paschal hymn "Christ is risen from the dead. By death He has trample upon death and to those in the tombs He is bestowing life". We greet one another with "Christ is Risen!". And we feast!

Lent is my favorite season because through it I have learned how to celebrate our Lord's resurrection. I have learned that celebrating takes preparation. I could not celebrate Pascha fully without going through the purging lent brings. I will end with the lenten prayer by St. Ephraim the Syrian:

 Lord and Master of my life, take away from me the spirit of laziness, idle curiosity, lust for power and vane talk.

But grant unto me, Thy servant, a spirit of chastity, humility, patience and love.

Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see mine own faults and not to judge my brother or sister. For blessed art Thou unto the ages of ages. Amen.