Mother's Day with Sister!

I have been neglecting my blog recently but I feel justified in blaming that mostly on my sister. My younger sister has been living in Thailand for the past year working as a journalist for YWAM and just returned home this past Friday to her ecstatic family and friends. My husband, the kids and I spent the weekend celebrating both my sister's homecoming and Mother's day at my parent's home. It was a wonderful weekend and a fantastic way to celebrate motherhood.
Sunday afternoon, while the family was gathered round the table eating lunch, my sister asked both my mom and I what our favorite thing was about being a mom. My mom's answer surprisingly was birth. She saw the beauty and wonder in the struggle that it is to bring a new life into the world and that unparalleled moment when you meet your baby for the first time. I completely understand why she answered that way. And it is a big reason why I have become such a huge supporter of natural birth (I'm sure there will be many posts on that to come). After thinking about the question for a while I had two answers I couldn't decide between. The first was the absolute joy and wonder it is to get to know your children. It still baffles my mind that these adorable little babies have distinct personalities, dreams and desires that will grow and morph as time goes on. I am made aware of this distinctiveness every day as I try to give both my children the attention and care that they individually need, often in very different ways.
The second answer I had was the great eye opening realization of who you are that comes with being a mom. There are very few things that can humble me as quickly as when I realize that the reason I am getting mad at my child is because of my own selfishness rather than any wrong act. (Don't get my wrong, there are plenty of disobedient acts to get frustrated over, but that is not always why I get angry) Our priest once said that the flaws we see in our children are often mirror images of the flaws we ourselves have. Children are little sponges that soak up everything around them. Sadly this also includes our short comings and mistakes. While I would rather that my children do not learn my bad habits I do see their reflection of them as a way for me to see what I need to change about myself. After I have recognized the need for the change and begun that process can I show my kids the proper way to act. It does me no good getting frustrated at Titus because he wants to play games on my iPhone when the reason I want my iPhone is to play my games. My kids are my best and easiest method of learning patience and humility.

My mom and sister in Thailand

I want to conclude by thanking my mom for teaching me how to lovingly and joyfully serve my family the way she cared for us (and still does). I still talk to my mom at least once a day (often a couple times a day) and while we may get made fun of for it, I pray that my kids will want to call me everyday when they are grown up. I was blessed to have such a wonderful family and thank God for them daily.

Wait, you named your daughter what?

My motivation in writing this post is to answer that burning question that I have been asked so often, what is your daughter's name and why on earth did you name her that?

My daughter's name is Ksenia, pronounced X(hard x sound, like in box) en-ya. I know it is unique. Upon telling people her name I have had most every reaction from "Oh that is beautiful" to "Wow, that is.... unique.". One lady actually apologized to my daughter telling her how sorry she was that she had that name. But the most common response is "Why did you name your daughter that?". So here is my explanation for this "crazy" name we gave her.

First, my name is Jessica. Jessica in 1985 just happened to be the #1 name for girls. It held that #1 position for most of the 80s. That meant that every class I ever had from kindergarten to college there was at least one other Jessica or Jessie. In one class there were actually six Jessies and Jessicas. I hated it. Because of this I always swore that I would not give my kid a really common name. Second, when you are baptized in the Orthodox church you take the name of a saint or feast of the church as your "baptized name". Often parents will name their children what they want them to be baptized as, though not always. Robert and I both agreed that we wanted to name our children what we plan on them being baptized as. That being the case we have limited our name options to those of the saints. We had originally chosen to name our first daughter Elena (after Saint Helen) because we both love that name but circumstances changed our minds.

St. Xenia of St. Petersberg Russia lived in the 18th and was considered a "fool for Christ". She lived her life in such a manner that seemed foolish to the world around her but was done purposefully so that she was not praised for the acts of kindness and mercy she preformed. Her life can be found here: http://ocafs.oca.org/FeastSaintsViewer.asp?SID=4&ID=1&FSID=100297

As an Orthodox Christian we believe that the saints are "alive in Christ" in heaven and intercede for all of us in prayer to God continually. It is a common practice to ask a specific saint to pray for you as you would ask a friend for prayer. Certain saints are known for helping in specific areas because of their lives or miracles preformed in the past. St. Xenia is often asked for help in find work and housing. The past four years we have asked for her intercession often for both of those things and with her intercessions we have seen God provide for us in ways we would have never expected! Because of the impact her life has had on us as well as her prayers for us, Robert and I both felt strongly that we wanted to name our first daughter after her to honor her.

Ksenia is the Greek spelling of the name Xenia. We chose to spell it in the Greek style partly because we like how it looks better and because we wanted to avoid people called her "Xena" or "Zeen-ya". I am well aware of the fact that she will always have to explain her name to people but I see that as well worth it to bare the name of such a beautiful saint. 

The freedom of wheels!

I love being a stay at home mom and would not want it any other way but there are those days that I long for a little more freedom. Robert and I only have one car so when Robert heads off to work if I want to go anywhere it better be within walking distance! I don't mind most of time (I'm kind of a homebody anyways) but it would be nice to run to store with the kids during the day if I need to or go to a play date that isn't only at our house. So when I found out that we were going to be borrowing my sister's car for the two weeks before she gets home I was elated! Visions of shopping trips, play dates and random trips to all of the other places I always wish I could take the kids started drifting through my head.
We got her car on Saturday afternoon and I was jumping for joy! Come Monday morning Robert left for work in her car and I had the van and you know what I did? Nothing! I stayed at home with the kids all day and went nowhere. After realizing that I wasn't going anywhere I was angry at myself for not taking advantage at my short lived freedom but then I reviewed what I had spent my time doing that day. I had spent the morning making my family a yummy breakfast and then after cleaning up a bit played with my kids. I worked with Ksenia on her sitting up skills and read Titus a plethora of books. After making lunch for them they both went down for naps and I got a little break. I loved how I had spent my time. I could have been out doing all those errands I always want to but instead I spent enjoying my children.
I do plan on taking advantage of my mobility and have arranged a play date for almost everyday for the next week but the freedom to go places made me appreciate the fact that I enjoy staying where I am at.